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I'm Blonde

By Rach

DISCLAIMER: Not mine … you know the drill!
SUMMARY: Ever wondered what's with Anya changing her hair all the time?
RATING: PG
SPOILERS: Up to 'Grave'
DISTRIBUTION: Satan's Toady, SU, Magic Man, Untamed Desires. Anywhere else, ask!
DEDICATION: For Princess Twilite and Christie, who egged me on with this one, and for Tonya and Topaz, the other two of the three punchkateers!

"I'm blonde." I said. "I coloured my hair." I thought about that for a second. "Again." I wondered if I was overdoing it. "I'm blonde." I repeated, quietly.

Giles smiled at me. "I noticed."

Of course he noticed. He always notices. I've had God knows how many different hairstyles since I first arrived here - and he's noticed and mentioned every single one of them.

Which is more than I can say for Xander.

First there was my Snow White phase. Except that never really worked, 'cause of my skin not being pure white, and my lips not being quite so red. Plus it just looked weird. He mentioned that one while I was all worried about Xander being trapped in the house with the two-inch high fear demon. Of course I didn't know he was two-inches high at the time, or I might have been in less of a hurry. But there I was in my stupid rabbit costume, which made it extremely difficult to walk, and I took my head off for two minutes because I was getting all woozy with the heat in there. And I was standing there, all sticky and sweaty, and he just stopped what he was doing and looked at me. It was a little lighter than when I'd turned up in his apartment a few days earlier. I'd already had enough of that particular look by then.

"Anya, I meant to say - your hair …"

"You hate it."

"I wasn't going to say that."

"Well you should. I hate it."

"It's different. I must say, though - I liked it a lot when it was shorter. It really suited you."

I would probably have blushed then, except my face was already too red from the stupid bunny suit. But I knew that was what I had to do next. I liked having the attention - Xander never commented on how I looked. Not in that way. Looking back on it, I think I was more of a nuisance to him, and maybe he thought I'd go away if he ignored me enough. To begin with, anyway.

But after that comment from Giles - I knew what I had to do. I got it cut. Not right away, of course … I kept it like that for Thanksgiving. He commented again that day. He said he'd thought I was getting it cut, and had I changed my mind? I told him no, I was still going to get it cut - right after I saved Xander from all of the diseases he had.

Except for when I got round to it, I got a little more cut than I intended to. I got all carried away, daydreamy, in the salon, and then when I looked up and she asked if that was okay, I really wanted to say "No, stick it all back on." But even though I sometimes blurt things out that I'm not supposed to say - I'm not stupid. Even I know you can't do that.

"Your hair looks lovely, Anya."

"It's too short." I was huffy, and he didn't mention it again after that. I know he agreed, though.

It grew back after a while. The night we saw him singing, it was longer then. I had it up on my head, and he told me he liked it that way. It was blonder, too. He likes it when it's blonde. He liked my highlights, as well. Xander didn't notice those - so no change there.

He even commented when I started curling it a bit. I don't know if Giles knew how excited I used to get before I walked into his place, or the shop, wherever. Wondering if he was going to have any new comment to make.

It didn't take long for me to get bored of looking like I had a drowned rat on my head, and went back to it being straighter. I went blonder, too, and a little bit shorter.

Then I went and started curling it again. That stayed for a while, because I didn't have the courage to change it much. I had other things on my mind … and Giles was hardly ever around, because he was too busy looking after Buffy, while Buffy was looking after her mom.

I switched between curly and straight, and blonde and not so blonde a bunch of times before I went for something a bit more different. Even so, if I spent even a half hour curling my hair, or styling it even a little bit differently, he'd notice. Just one "your hair looks nice today, Anya," and I'd be satisfied.

I let it grow over the summer when Buffy was gone. I didn't really do anything for him to comment on - because I knew he wouldn't. His mind was all over the place … until one day, just before he left.

"You let your hair grow," he blurted out. He didn't really blurt it, I guess, but it was still unexpected. He'd been sitting at the counter, looking over the books, and then suddenly, boom. He was talking about my hair.

All I could say was "Yeah, I did." And then I went back to dusting the merchandise, because I couldn't think of anything else to add.

I meant to get a hair cut before he left, because I knew it would be a long time before I saw him again. He left so suddenly, I didn't get chance. Then when I heard he was coming back, I decided it was time for a change again. I tried to crimp it, but it ended up all … bla. A bit of a caught in a storm look.

He didn't mention that one straight away - first there was the hugging, and then there was the welcoming … it wasn't until the first time we were alone together that he mentioned it. Although by this point, I'd washed it, and it was just straight again.

"Your hair looked nice yesterday," he smiled, as he looked over the books to see how many mistakes I'd made.

"Now you're just lying to make me feel better."

I tried the whole crimping thing again, and it turned out a little better this time. And then I straightened it, except I dyed it browner. There were just a few blonde bits left it in.

"Morning, Giles."

"Good morning, Anya." He looked up from the cash register. This had been the day when everything had gotten horribly embarrassing between us, with the kissing, and groping, and … not that I'm saying it was a bad thing. "Your hair's brown."

"Do you like it?"

"It suits you."

"But do you like it?" I pressed.

"Yes, Anya," he sighed, still smiling. "I like it."

Which was why I felt the need to mention it when he walked back in the door that day. Obviously, the whole "Willow's evil" thing was a pressing issue, but I just felt like I didn't have anything else to say to him. I wasn't really part of the gang any more. And he was all over Buffy like a rash.

"I'm blonde." I said. "I coloured my hair." I thought about that for a second. "Again." I wondered if I was overdoing it. "I'm blonde." I repeated, quietly.

Giles smiled at me. "I noticed."

I grinned back, and he held his arm out, letting me into the hug. I should have known he'd notice.

He always notices.

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